HTT Storytime!
by Maidin
Summary: One moment, five students from Sakuragaoka started telling stories after watching bunch of anime inside Light Music Club Room
1. Azusa's Version

I was horsing around when I saw myself sinking into a toilet bowl in a toilet at a stadium track. I tried to resist from getting inside, but the toilet seemed to be empowered by a powerful pressure from inside. In other words...

IT didn't flush by me. It's from someone else. But no one's there but me. Eventually, I followed the current. My scream went unheard even though I guess it could be heard by people nearby. IF THEY WOULD WANT TO.

I opened my eyes after the current seemed to be subside. I was surprised - Green woods stood around me like if I'm in a fairy tale or something. And then I saw a wolf leaning at me hungrily. It barks at me, which of course then I ran like a rabbit into the deep forest without knowing where to. The wolf kept on chasing me. It barks loudly until I realized one thing - I'm a game. That wolf isn't just the only one.

Soon, a pack of wolves came over to win the competition. That time, I started to run like a madman. I knew it! Somehow, I remember Einstein's quote "Hidden in troubles lies the key to the greatest opportunity". But I ran too fast until I did not see a hole beneath me. I plummeted straight down into the depth, leaving the wolves circling the hole and bark at me as if they're wanting to look for trouble with a girl like me, the one who plays guitar for Light Music Club in Sakuragaoka High School.

I opened my eyes. A girl with blue hair and pink-striped uniform was standing before me. She looked busy with something on her hand. She looked serious by judging at her face signal.

So I braced myself and spoke to her.

"H...Hello? Where am I?" I asked. There's no answer. The girl then turned to me after waiting for thirty minutes. That was when she suddenly yells and curses with Japanese bad words. And she looked at me and goes "Welcome, boy."

"I'm a girl," I answered. She ignores me by giving me a potion. "Drink this. With this, you may enter the little world," said the girl. Suddenly, her PSP beeps loudly. She ignores me once more and tends to it. "Huuu! Game event! Eroge Daisuki!" yodels a girl named Konata Izumi. I called her again, but she said to me "Shut the f**k up! I'm working here! Can't you see Izumi Konata is trying to surpass the legendary God of Conquest Katsuragi Keima?" She turned to the PSP and then turned at me, saying, "I don't want to say this but..."

"Let's make this workin'!"

And then she played her Eroge titled "Akane Iro ni Somaru Saka". I heard some moaning sound from the PSP. I heard it as if she's playing Freddy Kruger.

So by then, I wait again. Suddenly, she giggles loudly like a banshee. "Huhuhuhu... I've been waiting for you. You're mine!" I sweated badly that time until I-"

"What happened next?" asked Yui. Her heart thumps for no reason after hearing her story which doesn't looked so thrilling at all. Azusa sighed at her and goes "I got no idea already. Anyone can continue the plot?" Azusa looked around. She got her angered to see everyone including Mio sleeping soundly even though it's just 1 pm!

So Azusa basically took a pail of water from Ton-chan and hurled it like catapult to them. Ritsu was like a ninja. She knew this would coming and evaded it. The gooey stuff sticks at Mio until she woke up, she thinks that—Mio went up and wails until her hand lands to Azusa like a rotor fan.

Azusa gets herself thrashed like Nanoha Takamachi firing Divine Buster to Fate Testarossa (Her).

Ritsu pats Azusa's bruised head before smacking her. "I got some of THEM too. Anyway, your storyline sucked! Better me continue," she cleared her throat. Let me start!

To be continued...


	2. Ritsu's Version

I clenched my fist tight when I heard her curing alone like a lunatic. She then turned to me like Juon. She looked enraged. "Get out of my sight, b***h."

I really had no idea what is she talking about. Konata got up with a club on her hand. She wanted to kill me! Is she angry because of losing that game? I think she's trying to put me as a 'punching bad' for her stress. Then I launched my fist first to her, making her topple down like a swiss roll. And then I drank the potion. Konata wanted to stop me, but it was too late.

"No!"

I found myself growing larger. I'm turning giant in just a second. I can feel my leg stepping something squishy. After that, I saw blood dripping from the spot where I stepped on. I close my eyes for a moment when everything crumbles and collapses. I saw bright sky ahead of me.

Konata was there too. She's flying in the air with a pair of Tenshi wings like Kanade Tachibana. She looked at me with mean eyes. "I'll be back, giant-" suddenly, her heavenly PSP beeps again. "Huu! A Timed Event!" I saw her joyfully flying up to the sky until she was found nowhere, no more. Perhaps to Heaven maybe?

I walked out of the place and went to the woods... again. I felt very lonely there, until at one point I heard big thud ahead. I went out to see what's going on.

I saw a girl with twin pigtails beating another girl with bunny ears. That pigtail girl wore nothing but black bikini and shorts. Her left eye blazes with blue flame. The other girl is black-haired, wearing maid outfit and screaming to no one after the twin pigtail taking out a crooked katana and tries to cut her like paper.

I wanted to help, but I couldn't. You know why? It's because the maid outfit. So moe. Moe Moe Kyun!

I just sat there and watch the duel like in TV. The maid suddenly went to me and took cover behind me. I saw the pigtail sprang to me Her crooked katana shines with blood and sounded like metal clanking to the earth. She looked so brutal, and ugly.

She went closer and breathe heavily. She said to me "Stay out of me, or I'm gonna kill you," I know what's she looking for. So I backed off. But the bunny-eared maid won't stop letting out of me. She's weeping, and I felt even more MOE.

Somehow, I didn't realize that I've been holding on a pink-coloured jewel. I took it and breaks it. Suddenly, there was a heavy glow coming from me. I found my uniform torn out and white barrier jacket came out, covering me like some sort of magical girl or something.

The pigtail looked at new me with awe and amazement. She is drooling. I even had a magic staff! The maid cries to me "I don't wanna die! Please get rid of me from that flat-chested-b***h!"

"The Queen wants you to be her maid. I would stop at nothing to get you, you busty-" she blushes and stopped when saying that word. "It-It's not that I want to say it out!"

I heard the staff talking to me. "Unleash your power, use the Divine Buster," three of us were startled, especially the pigtail. She stepped back abd had her huge black rock cannon aiming to me. "So... You're trying to me from getting her? Fine! Then I'll burn both of you to charcoal!" her cannon starts humming.

I don't know what to do. "Just use your Divine Buster, damn it! It's the only thing you have to tackle this b***h!" then I started to wonder, when did something like Raising Heart starts saying bad words? Nevertheless, I did what it said and acted like a girl in an anime.

My Engrish doesn't looked so good, but I did said "Dibain Basuta!" I saw the staff emits out a long, pink-coloured beam at time when the pigtail firing blue long beam to me. Our beams intersected in the middle.

"You can't stop me!" shouted the pigtail loudly and proud. Sudden;y, she mews instead of laughing. "Nyanyanyanyanyanyanyan~~"

Just who the f**k is this nekomini, flat-chested-b***h is? Nevertheless, my power's getting lower and weaker. Well, what else can I say, I'm an amateur, right?

I heard the maid whispers to me "Let me help you," both me and the pigtail immediately turned around to see that maid making her finger formation into love shape.

The maid was trying to do something. I can't it describe it fully, but I couldn't stop saying moe of what she did next. I don't even know how many did I say "moe". I saw the pigtail even said 'moe' too until she lost her concentration. Her cannon beam disperses like gas, allowing my Divine Buster to move forward.

The moment the beam gone, it's the maid's turn. From her moeness comes a very long beam with love shape outside it. She's shouting "Moe Moe Kyun!" loudly. The pigtail didn't evade nor resist; she's staying there. She gets herself completely immobilized by the Usagi Maid. "So Moe..." I saw my Divine Buster and Moe Beam reaching her until an explosion fills the greeneries into pink.

The maid turned around and smiled. "Come with me," she said. I'm still wearing the barrier jacket. It's not that I don't know how to discard it; I liked the costume very much! I'm like a cosplayer!

"What's your name?"

"I'm Milo, the damsel of Moeville."

All of a sudden, a cockroach came, and the maid screamed and held on me like a kindergartner-

Ritsu gets herself beaten up by Mio. "Who do you think you are, making me as your complete moron subject in your story?" Mio was complete;y outraged by her 'character'. "Why the hell my name's Milo?"

Azusa's trauma was far worse than Mio's. She is now groping her chest repeatedly. "Am I really that THIN?" she moans.

"But the storyline's good!" comments Mugi. "I like the word Dibain Basuta! Reminds me a lot of Nanoha-chan," Mugi was holding a DVD with title 'Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha'. "So what happened next, Ricchan? Where they go next?" asked Mugi, waiting impatiently for her to retell.

"Umm... well... I got my idea already dries out," she had many 'hills' on her head thanks to Mio. She looked at Azusa. "You should put in more interesting story background earlier. Now, we're stucked in here!" Ritsu accused Azusa for making the story more boring. But Azusa didn't care of that. She gets traumatized. "Maybe I should save up money for my surgery..." she muttered.

"Let me continue your plot!" Yui volunteers. Ritsu turned to her in suspicion. "I hope it's good, Yui. Don't put in food parts too much."

"If you put me into the scene again, you'll be Baka Ritsu," threatened Mio. Azusa breaks up "I'm flat-chested. Nyaaaaaannnnnn!" she burst to a terrible tantrum.

Yui cleared her throat before saying out loud

To be continue...


	3. Yui's Version

I walked out from an enchanted jungle after having a 'nice' stay at her house. It's a house with things you would never imagine of - chocolates everywhere, and marshmallows are in fact the house's roof.

She literally offered me to enjoy my stay there so she can give me the greatest opportunity as a fair exchange for rescuing her from the flat-chested Black Rock Shooter earlier. At first, I refuse, but after Milo hands me a gingerbread house, with the excessive icing cream and cherries from the Alps, coated with the fine brown cover, I chose to stay.

Her house really IS a food. I saw the window glass made of ice-cream bar. It's transparent although it's colored. But still, I still can see its inside. I started tearing the window and munch it. Milo didn't stop me from taking the biscuit-based from door and put them into my mouth.

As I'm in, the fun never gets end yet. I saw a table with hundred of things I never seen before in my entire life. There's even a stuffed savory chicken on plate. Milo looked at me acting like a piglet, finishing everything in just a short moment.

Man, I knew it's gonna be the happiest moment in my life. Moreover, what are the chances that I will meet bacon cheeseburger along with Chashu Ramen plus Takoyaki like if the Takoyaki's like KFC cheesy wedges?

I was about to go when Milo suddenly insisted to make me stay put here for long. I was gonna said that I need to go when suddenly I fell unconscious. Well... I've to admit, Milo seemed to add those food with Panadol or something. I could hear clearly someone crackling like vulture while I'm closing my eyes.

I had a very strange dream. I saw myself hanging upside down. But my finding's was quite awesome - There's a river under me. The stream flows chocolate cream. I didn't regret it even though blood spurting out of my nostrils.

And when I woke up from my dream, I found myself inside a cage made of candy wafers. I sniffed around and identified it as the smell of marinated chicken or something. Soon, I started to realize something fishy.

It's like Hansel and Gratel story, where an old witch lures the two kids into her Gingerbread House and then tries to eat them by getting them fat by letting them eat everything inside the house. The witch almost get two of them as her dinner if not because of Gratel quick action.

But in this case, there's only Gratel. I AM THE GRATEL. I heard crackling again from the kitchen. And that's already so convincing enough! Milo came in with a tray of butter buns. I was almost saying thank you as I remember the Hansel and Gratel. But she didn't see me around. I'd just ate a portion of that cage and dashing off into an old stove. Milo grunts like a hungry tiger. She then picked up a meet hook from the kitchenware closet. From that moment, my spine chills like ice.

I stared at the moe-looking Milo taking gashing the meats from the fridge and then munch the meat like a hyena. What a 'nice' sight, I thought. But i didn't feel those 100%. My mind was at a meat log that I found inside the stove.

Milo taunted "Come out, come out, my friend! I have something to show you," I saw Chashu Ramen on her hand. I immediately leapt out and almost getting that Ramen when Milo suddenly tapped me with a stun teaser. I was electrified almost immediately. Like a dead weight, I'm not dead yet. Yet, I fell right to her face. I didn't hear any voices from her after that. I think she's either dead or maybe in concussion.

And then, I took all the oat bars as many as I can before leaving this Gingerbread House. I managed to leave the house without trace. People would say I maybe set fire on it so no one would realize the disappearance of Milo, regarding to what happened earlier, according to Ricchan. But instead of doing that, I prepare myself for the Guinness Record. I sank my teeth into the House and... You'll know what I'm doing next.

Well after that, I left the place with Milo hung upside down. I heard very loud shrieking sound after I left the Jungle. At that time, I was already outside the jungle and saw a path made of concrete.

"You're making us hungry, you know that?" comments Ritsu. "I thought I already told you about 'no food' policy earlier!" Yui chuckles and scratched her head. "I can't help myself, Ricchan."

Mio was not-so-thrilled about the story. But she's angry, even madder than before. She carries Ritsu up to the air and glares at her with a mean look. "Woi, Mio, you really remind me of Freddy.."

"Shut the f**k up! You're the one who 'created' me until Yui got that kind of idea!" yelled Mio. Azusa is still in traumatized status. She'd no mood of wanting to hear Yui's story. But Mugi has gotten more pumping by Yui. "You've inspired me, Yui-chan. Anyway, shouldn't the character becomes fatter because of too much food?"

Yui smiled at Mugi and said "Nope. She had her weight completely maintained, just like me!"

Her reply made Mugi and Mio looked on one another. "I'm jealous of Yui. What about you, Mugi?" Mio asked. Mugi shook her had. "I understand that, Mio-chan. I got an idea, how about we get a sauna session at Hokkaido?"

"You got a sauna place there?" Ritsu blurted in surprised. Actually, it wasn't too surprising already for the other, considering that Mugi is a daughter of a rich family, maybe like Nagi Sanzenin in HnG. You know what it is, right?

A door opened, and Sawako-sensei walked in. "Good evening, girls!" said Sawako like someone who never met the band. Ritsu said "We got an intruder here, Yui, let's throw her out." Yui raised her right hand above her head like a soldier. "Aye, Captain!" she said in English accent.

"Hey, it's me! Come on!" Sawako sounded like a scared person when Yui and Ritsu turned against her, dragging her like a trolley back to the doorway. "We don't know you, intruder. It is best for you to be not knowing us and our secret program here!" mumbled Ritsu. She really sounded like a commando. "What're you talking about? I'm your teacher, you idiot!" they are still taking her away. But that was not long before Sawako took out her spec and turned around. She looked so intimidating that Ritsu and Yui stopped immediately. Ritsu turned to Yui and goes, "Sounds like we just brought a Lucifer back to life," said Ritsu with pale face.

Three minutes later, Mugi comes into the party with a tray of tea and cakes, as usual. Sawako gracefully indulges herself into the treats after leaving Yui and Ritsu completely scarred. Now, it's three of them - Azusa, Yui and Ritsu. "Sawa-chan's reminding me of John Kramer..."

"Who do you address me as?" Sawako yells at Yui until she eventually broke up. "Ricchan, someone's turning this scene into SAW!" she hugged Ritsu like a frightened cat. "I'm Sawako, not that stupid Jigsaw guy!"

Mugi clears her throat and turned all attentions to her. "I think I got myself an idea to continue that story," Mugi suggested. But Ritsu objects her. "I feared some of us will ended up like Azusa later on if we continue this," said Ritsu. "Moreover, it's Azusa's fault for bringing up such a stupid background story," Azusa turned to her and had a look like a corpse. "And you made it even worse..." snarls Azusa before pouncing her angrily. Mugi smiles at her and said :

"Don't worry, Ricchan. Mine will blow your mind. Now hear mine."

To be continue... again?

P/S – I don't own this anime, nor any stories related to this. Just my imagination!


	4. Mugi's Version Uno

So here it goes...

After making a run across the woods, I found a tent. I didn't think a lot before getting inside it, and that's one big thing I would never stop being regret of. When I walked in, I saw few guys sitting on chiars, murmuring about something regarding war. I heard them said this clearly, and they seemed to ignore me.

Finally, one of the butlers realized me and turn around. "Ah, a new visitor," said one of the four butlers. I called them butlers because they had attires like butlers. "What brings you here?" asked another butler. Another butler felt worried that he cracks out. "Shoot, someone broke in! This is bad!" the last butler stops his comrade from acting maliciously. "I'm sure this one's not hostile," said the last butler.

"By the way, I am Sebastian Michaelis. These are my comrades – Subaru Konoe, Hayate Ayasaki and Hino Akiharu," said the English-faced guy. I considered him as an Englishman because he speaks English and made a strange accent like I always heard in TV. Hayate gets up and greeted me. "Nice to meet you," said Hayate with a tone of a lady. Hino approaches him and make a smack of him. "What's that for?"

"You sounded like a lady. Please don't humiliate yourself," said Hino. His words pierces him like sharp knives, considering that Hayate himself had face like a cute loli girl. I couldn't agree more. Hayate then sat at the corner and I felt a black aura swindling around him. Subaru went forward to greet me. "Hi, I am Subaru!"

I felt soft and gentle hand. "What a nice boy are you!" said I. Subaru looked at me with a mean look. "I am a girl, you know. That's why my skins softer than these idiots."

"Who do you called idiot, huh?" yelled Hino. I laughed, even though it's not actually funny at all.

"Of course I'm talking about you. Who's the idiot other than you?" Hino felt provoked and sprang to her. A fight happens, but Sebastian was able to stop the tide of anger before it gets serious. "You shouldn't say that to someone who's amateur on this, Subaru-san," said Sebastian. Subaru realized her doing and nodded her head. "I understand that, Sebastian. I'm sorry for that, Hino," she went down and apologized. However, what Sebastian was more of hurting Hino more than what Subaru just did.

I saw Hino went to the other corner, looking very blue.

I had my dinner there with them when suddenly the tent door opened and a girl with shining armor walks in. "I got some bad news for you guys!" said the knight. Hino sipped the bowl of soup while saying to her "Do not worry – we've been killing lots of THEM. They'll never get to us that easy," said Hino confidently. I don't know what he talked about. But then the girl explored deeper into the explanation. "No. This time, they got themselves a new leader. Her name's Azu the Flat-chested Black Rock Shooter."

I dropped my cup almost immediately after hearing that. Did I just...?

Hino was getting nervous breakdown. He started squealing and rolling on the ground. "I can't stand against that b***h! Why does she had to be here?" Hino cried. Subaru and Hayate glanced at him as if he's a criminal waiting gallow. I didn't relate my intersection with them about that girl. "So, where is she?" asked Sebastian. "She'll be here by tomorrow. By then, we must have enough manpower against them. Who's with me?"

Sebastian, Hayate and Subaru had no trouble of signing in for her. But Hino seemed to have problem. "You see... I don't really want to-"

"You're a lady, Hino... I mean Hime-sama," commented Subaru. After that, Hino immediately signing in. "A man will never back down!" said Hino confidently with his right fist smacking his chest repeatedly. "Stop it; You're hurting yourself," said Sebastian.

I joined them too. The woman with armor said to me who I am and what am I doing here. I told her that I don't really know what to do around here. "I see," nodded Saber Pentdragon, the name of the knight. "I guess I'm gonna have you implanted with us," she handed me a lance. But I said to her no thanks. "I had one already," I showed her my Raising Heart Jewel. All of a sudden, all the butlers ans Saber herself were in an utter shock. "Are you a mahou-shoujo?" Hino breathe out loud like a madman. "Sounds like we have some privilages we can use here," said Subaru.

So all of us went through many valleys nearby. We recruited a lot of people in every place we visited. We even climbed hills only to find the last bastion of people so they can join us in the battle. While climbing on it, Hino accidentally gropes Subaru's chest. He was trying to find support to prevent himself from falling, so he raised is hand upwards. But instead of grabbing something, he grabbed something very soft... very squishy...

Subaru yelped in bewilderment and eventually, her legs were enough to make Hino bouncing down the hills. His screams echoed throughout the area, but no one really cares. "I know he's alive down there," said Sebastian when he sees me making a worrying face. "Just ignore that ass! We're moving!" said Subaru furiously before she ascends upper than us. We just follow her suit. Saber meanwhile was waiting at the ground with her eyes fixed at Hino.

So we made it to the top. We all were shocked to see a tower ahead. Sebastian turned to Hayate. "Rapunzel?" gasped Sebastian and Hayate altogether. "Stop it! You both really sounded like kindergartners!" answered Subaru. It was some kinds of comedy that I could not barely not to laugh, especially when I saw Hino bouncing downhills like a ball.

Sebastian made himself a try by shouting to the tower top. "Rapunzel, let down your hair!" he shouted in macho tone. Hayate did otherwise; he starts climbing the tower, knowing the fact that Sebastian's charm would beat him easily. In short, they were thinking that there is Rapunzel up there, and if one of them acts fast, that woman will be his.

Hayate climbed like Son Goku (Journey to the West) across the vertical wall. Sebastian wouldn't let him away easily, so he did the same thing too. He leaps like a monster and almost getting Hayate before Hayate gave him a good kick. Sebastian ended up plummeting back to the hill terrain. It was a very loud thud, but strangely he still gets up and cracks his head normally. "This guy's really motivated," comments Sebastian. "But I'm not gonna giving up," he starts climbing again. This time, he does the impossible – He runs vertically like a ninja and hurls a horde of forks to Hayate like a ninja throwing shurikens.

Subaru couldn't stand it. "Hey, are you guys forgetting the important thing we should do here?" she yelled angrily. But the two guys didn't hear her as they are already at ¾ of the tower height, almost getting to the balcony of the tower.

"Come on, _. Let's go," said Subaru. I just followed her went down, leaving Sebastian and Hayate minding their own business. Please note that there is no name for this main character.

But when we arrived at downhills. Surprise came to us. The people was firing with rifles in random direction. Subaru saw a bomb shell coming to us. She pushes me to far left of me before the bomb reach her and... I could not give details about what happened to Subaru Konoe, but it's quite saddening.

I saw the assailant – That Black Rock Shooter! "Hahahahaha! I heard you PAWNED Milo. Is that true?" BRS questioned me. "You see, that's the reason why the Queen ordered me to capture her. She'd just ate some of my comrades when you suddenly barged in and beat me with your..." she blushes all of a sudden. "Ma...Magic... Ah, forget it! And now, you're siding with the rebels. Scumbag's like you must die!" she pints out her huge, Black Rock Cannon to me. 

I called my Raising Heart, and I turned back to Barrier Jacket form. This time, it's Aggressive Mode. BRS looked at me with more of wild things inside her mind. It seems that my moe has stuns her that she doesn't even stopping me from casting out Divine Buster.

Again, she's nowhere to be seen after that. So I joined Saber's forces against the Imperial Armies. The armies were known as Stormtroopers, and according to Saber, "They're here by Darth Vader, and something's telling me that they're here because they want to find all the rebels and cook them... I mean us."

As the Stormtroopers getting too many already, our forces have exhausted. "Retreat! We can't continue more! Where are all my butlers?" said Saber anxiously. She wonders why all of those four not around in this dangerous time. I could only pointing on Subaru's remain.

Thing gets even worse. The Stormtroopers all came in with their special, popular ATAT (All Transport Any Terrain). I wanted to scream and run, but the Raising Heart stops me. Instead, it gives me an urge of wanting to avenge Subaru. "I'm gonna avenge Subaru!" I said to Saber before I started soraing up to the air and start charging my powers. I'm going to do something unexpected. Saber realized this and immediately ordered the others to back off.

The stormtroopers looked at me and fired me, but my Protection Magic deflects everything. Soon, there's a huge, a very huge pink-colored magic ball floating above my Raising Heart staff. It's expanding, and it's gonna burst in any seconds.

I pointed the bomb to the incoming reinforcement and releases it. "Starlaitooooooo... Bureakaaaaaaaa!~~~~~~" I leave you this part to imagine what happened next to the armies.

"I must've said this..." said Ritsu after that. "You should be the one who decides the story."

"Well, Azusa's the one who started this," chuckles Mugi. Azusa was traumatized even more. "I'm flat-chested..."

"Anyway, your story plot looked good... except that the story should be good and better if you continue it," said Mio while sipping her tea. "Oh, I'm not finished yet!"


End file.
